A Year and a Prayer

Our lives are always in flux.  They rollercoaster through the hills and valleys of transition, hurt, recovery, contentedness, exhilaration and a host of other states of being.  In thinking about this I thought it would be important to write about my past year and the changes that have taken place because I have hit every one of those highs and lows.  I have come out on the other side better than I was before and I only have one to thank for it all.

Life was clicking along at the usual paces of crazy and crazier when I got a simple, unassuming invitation to a Christmas Eve service at Northview Church from my friend Crystal.  My husband and I had thought about church many times in the past, but when we would try a “you don’t belong here!” feeling would overwhelm us and we never visited a church twice.  But, something about a Christmas Eve service that year, 2010, seemed to pull at me.  We had our four little girls with us now and it seemed time. 

When we walked in I didn’t want to run back out, so that was a good sign.  We took our seats in the balcony of the auditorium (I had NEVER seen a church like this before) and we waited with anticipation to see what we got our selves into.  The lights went down, the music started and the lead Worship Pastor Matt Bays began.  It was then that I knew I had found my church home.  Luckily my husband felt the same way.  

We played with schedules and things over the next few months and tried to fit weekend services in there.  It was last March when Lead Pastor Steve Poe started talking about tithing and having a generous heart that I was thrown through a loop.  I have always considered myself a generous person, but tithing was something completely foreign to me.  My husband and I were already standing on our tip toes to breathe in our pool of debt.  I wrote the pastor and asked about this because I couldn’t get it off of my mind.  I had so many questions about so many things.  I am sure he thought I was crazy, but he told me a few things.  He said the only thing God guarantees without anything in return is His love for me and that I shouldn’t donate anything, or serve, unless I feel told to through prayer.  Then he said, “Give it a year.  Give it a year and see how you feel about everything.”

So… I prayed, as best as I knew how that I would gain some understanding about it all.

That year was up very recently and let me tell you about those 365 days.

Last May my husband, Brian, was sitting alone at church while I was away at a conference.  They had a spontaneous baptism that day and he thought he would wait until the whole family was together before making such a decision.  But, he was sitting there and he couldn’t wait.  As though the Holy Spirit was going to take control of his very own legs and take him down there he leaped up and committed to be baptized.  I, about an hour away, was leaving and found myself rushing for no reason.  I couldn’t get to meet them soon enough.  I thought they may still be at church and he wasn’t answering his phone, so I just went.  I am pretty sure a law or two might have been broken in that drive (shhh…  don’t tell) but I made it to the church.  The atrium was still empty and so I ran (literally here, in heals) up to our usual spot in the balcony.  I fell on the way up the stairs and opened the double doors in full on soap opera stopping the wedding style.  When I opened them all I saw was my husbands face on the huge screen ahead of me.  I was so confused and then I realized I was watching him accept Jesus Christ as his own Lord and Savior and then he went down under water to be baptized.  I just started crying because what else could I do?  He was somewhere around 80th in line of over a hundred that day and the timing was nothing but a gift.  That experience really opened our eyes.  The seed was starting to grow roots.

I bought my first bible in June and started reading it the week of our vow renewal in North Carolina.  That whole experience was saturated in God’s presence.

I joined a bible study with some amazing women over that summer.  I had NO idea what I was doing.  I didn’t know anything about the bible and I was not one that was used to opening myself up so vulnerably to people.  But, I did it.  I grew from it and I loved it. 

My husband and I took the 8 week ALPHA course at our church at the end of the summer.  We met remarkable people, ate a lot of food, learned things, laughed, soaked in concepts and ideas, discovered things and understood things we didn’t even know existed before.  Following this course we started a year long bible plan and both of us read a little everyday and talk about what we read with each other.  About this time is when I started volunteering in the children’s area and our family started greeting at the doors one weekend a month.  I have helped with funeral services to furnish meals to those grieving families  also. 

The Good neighbor weekend was amazing for our family. 

I took a huge step of faith for myself and started blogging for the church which connected me to so many areas of interest and with a wealth of truly gifted people.  Writing for the church gave me the courage to launch my own blog soon after that, which you are reading write now!

A campaign was done at the church in order to raise money for the church and missions and we happily committed without hesitation for the next three years.

The holidays came with another beautiful service and concert and then started a new year, 2012.  In January our family started serving at an ALPHA course.  It was 8 weeks of being the hands and feet and helping others have the extraordinary experience we did.  We also started with a life group this month.  This is a group of people you would never put together on paper, but ours hearts are very compatible.  The age ranges, experience ranges, and where we are in life are all over the place, but we work.  We work amazing together and we have become so close in such a short amount of time that it is clear it was written for us to be together.

(This is most of us after a food pack for Kids Against Hunger)

At the end of January I too was baptized.  It was a huge deal for me and in many ways it was bigger than my wedding or even the birth of my children because it was the true testament to the beginning of my relationship with the one who gave me all of those blessings in my life.  The one who has always been there even when I didn’t recognize him.

Just a couple of weeks ago my husband and I embarked on the Discipleship Walks.  Two consecutive weekends where my husband was gone and then myself.  Again, I met incredible people and grew more with my faith in three days than I would ever think possible.  It, by itself, was a transcending experience and I feel like I am living a new life on return.

When I came home, I realized my year was up.  The year gave me a colorful palate of experiences, people, emotional and spiritual warfare, peace and turmoil, love and light.  But, the biggest thing I have gotten out of this year is Me.  I now understand better who I am, who He wants me to be and the potential of who I can be. 

Thank you God.